Trying out recipes to pass on to you.

you lose some….you lose some

Posted: June 18th, 2009 | Author: leah | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | 6 Comments »

oh, friends….you picked a bad week for me to start blogging. rather, i picked a suck menu to stick with and start blogging.

another night, another Clean Eating magazine menu. lentil brown rice cakes & southwestern salad.

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oh no! that isn’t mine. mine went something like this

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yes, when in doubt smother it in dressing! (lesson 2?)

first problem- EVERYTHING called for cilantro…mine went limp and gooey about two days after purchasing it fresh at the farmers market. and the thing about cilantro is….there’s not really a good substitute. the “cilantro cream” to top the cakes were saved by my little chive plant. low-fat greek yogurt, chives, lime juice salt and pepper. it tasted like…yogurt. a dash of cumin helped out.

the goop on the salad? “creamy avocado dressing.” 1/2 an avocado low-fat yogurt, lime zest, lime juice, apple cider vinegar, honey and dijon mustard. it tasted like….yogurt. my avocado was over rip and the zest was overbearing. badness everywhere.

did i mention i was halfing the recipe….another possible fail theme. i KNEW hubs wouldn’t go for this beast. in 10 minutes i made him a pan fried chicken breast and wheat spaghetti dressed with butter, salt, garlic powder and olive oil. no veggies. i shivered a bit and felt like a failed wife. but only for about 17 seconds. after all i was jacking up bean cakes.

FORTY-FIVE minutes later after the lentils and rice had cooked and cooled they were mixed together with minced garlic, oregano, chopped onion, egg whites (come ON!) s&p and a bit of wheat flour. this, said the mag, would combine together to form pattys. LIE. a bit of cooking spray in the pan would “cook them until slightly brown.” LIE. I sprinkeld more flour over them, added olive oil to the pan and let the suckers fry. the result:

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first bite- not bad. second bite- no, this is  bad. third bite- get in my belly, it’s been over an hour of battling you lentils!

oh! and the salad….exactly. forgetable. the dressing was terrible over greans, red pepper, tomatoes and green onion.

i don’t want you to think Clean Living mag is bad…it’s this “cheap” menu. i see other dishes that look much tastier that i will try…later. dinner out thursday and with friends friday. a business banquet saturday. so i’m done. piles of dirty dishes to prove it.

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i promise to shake up the menu soon. back to the things i love the most (BUTTER! STEAK! DESSERTS!) mixed with some healthy stuff.

6 Comments on “you lose some….you lose some”

  1. 1 Joh-the Improviser said at 11:55 am on June 18th, 2009:

    Dude. I have a bone to pick with Clean Eating’s Cheap Menu. Also – I have never EVER had success with “just a little bit” of fat in the pan when sauteeing cakes not made of meat. EVER. They always always crumble. Why do magazines delude us into thinking that the bean cakes won’t crumble? I mean, yes, in an ideal world, it would work. But in an ideal world, would we really be making lentil and brown rice cakes?????

  2. 2 Waylon Summers said at 12:10 pm on June 18th, 2009:

    are you taking applications for additional husbands?

  3. 3 Jesse said at 1:23 pm on June 18th, 2009:

    That is too bad. The lesson is that clean food is a lie.

  4. 4 Waylon Summers said at 4:41 pm on June 18th, 2009:


  5. 5 leah said at 5:48 pm on June 18th, 2009:

    joh- in an ideal world, we would have good stylists

  6. 6 leah said at 5:49 pm on June 18th, 2009:

    waylon- one husband is all the laundry and dishes i can deal with. but you can visit!

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